i am going to be a pharmacist.

i feel like this last year has been the ultimate test of my patience. i am not the type of person who likes to wait for anything. actually i take that back, i can handle waiting for my food, my hazelnut latte, or holding on the phone for a prior authorization representative to help me with a patient's insurance problem. but life-changing decisions, i'm not a big fan of waiting for those. i've had moments of complete weakness and self-doubt that maybe this wasn't meant to happen but now the wait is finally over and i can finally breathe a little. i am going to UCSF SCHOOL OF PHARMACY in september. i cried for a good five minutes when i opened the letter. i really tried to imagine how i would react if i got accepted or rejected and this is definitely not what i imagined. i just cried and said OH MY GOD repeatedly at least 100 times. the call to my parents after was filled again with many "oh my gods" and "is this really real?" i don't know if i'll really believe this is real until i am actually there.

it's times like these that make me appreciate all the things around me. every time i think about how unreal it is that i will be going to ucsf and moving to san francisco i get overly excited and do a little happy dance inside my head. but my happy dance is also followed by a wave of sadness because there is alot i'm leaving behind in irvine and simi valley. my family, my friends, my returningloves, my KM, my pharmacy. it's alot and i know there is a bigger future for me in sf but there is a bittersweet sadness that lingers whenever i just take a moment to take everything in.

this year off has taught me so much. it could be a whole other post and i will save that for another day. but for now all i can say is that i am beyond content with life. nothing can top this feeling and i thank God for this opportunity. i just feel really really blessed. i don't know if anybody questions this but how is it that this can happen to me (or you)? like it sounds really selfish of me to even question but for the most part i've gotten everything i've ever wanted. i've been told by alot of people that i have "the perfect life." i really don't believe that i have the perfect life. but one thing i do believe is that hard work does pay off. and to me, this is just another example of hard work paying off. a very surreal example--somebody pinch me.

to add to all this good news, the cole haan bag i've been saving up for months now is finally on sale, such perfect timing it's bananas. it will be my gift to myself.